When A Loved One’s New Partner Raises Red Flags

We’ve all heard the fairy tale stories… “Oh I’ve just met the nicest guy! He’s an architect with property in a foreign country and he’s trying to get himself set up in my town. He’s wealthy, skilled, single, smart, charming, etc.” But as adult children, or friends of these extremely lucky lovebirds, we know that not every fairy tale has a happy ending, and predatory relationships do exist.

We want to do all that we can to protect our parents or friends from getting badly hurt, scammed, or both. But it’s not always easy to convince someone that their new companion is not a good fit for them. So what can you do when a loved one’s new partner raises red flags?

The answer is, a lot – if you’ve got a P.I. on your side. An experienced investigator can often verify or negate much of that “fairy tale story” by conducting research, accessing databases, and in some cases, using surveillance. The most frequent requests we receive in this area of investigation include job and income verification, social connections and affiliation searches, marital status confirmations, financial status checks, character and credibility assessments, asset searches, criminal background searches, history of violence or offender status checks, and general research to confirm or negate specific “facts” provided by the new love interest.

We understand that you want that matter looked into discreetly and efficiently because you have a genuine concern for your friend’s or your parent’s well-being. Of course you want that person to live a happy life without major relationship troubles, and ensuring that Prince or Princess Charming is as wonderful as your mom or dad says he or she is can save a lot of heartache, embarrassment and costs in the long run.

It’s important to note that these investigations are not only conducted on new love interests. Sometimes, there are no early signs to indicate that a parent has entered a predatory relationship. The new partner is kind, caring and genuinely seems to wants to build a healthy relationship. But a change in circumstances, such as a loss of a job, financial hardships, death in the family, or diagnosis of an illness, can change that partner too. It is not uncommon to hear of stories where a parent has mortgaged their home, sold a vehicle or invested heavily in order to support their partner, only to find out that he or she had an ulterior motive.

As you’re reading this, you may be worried about how your parent or friend will react. You may be fearful that they will be angry at you for getting involved in their business, even if there is proof to show that their partner is not the person they claimed to be. Sometimes the best intentions are met with the greatest resistance or lack of appreciation, however, in hiring a qualified investigations provider, the focus will be discretion and privacy. Keeping discretion and presenting the facts will go a long way towards helping the person you are concerned for see that your goal was to help, not to hurt him or her.

Over the years, I have seen a number of very smart and special people fall victim to predatory relationships – but I have also seen a number of people find that diamond in the rough and go on to lead long successful lives with their new partner. Being able to provide that sense of comfort and relief when I can report to a child, sibling, or a friend that the story does check out, makes everyone happy.

In this day and age, fewer people are meeting through friends or workplaces like they used to. There are now so many online dating sites, chat groups, social media networking platforms that it can be hard to meet someone and be able to take them at face value immediately. This is where the work of a competent investigator can help you protect yourself, and the ones you love.