LGBTQ And Parenting

December 16, 2019
Gary Direnfeld

Article written by Gary Direnfeld

Although this can be a divisive topic, the bottom line when it comes to the kids is, there is no difference. This is not to say kids of LGBTQ parents may not face discrimination and that these parents don’t have those fears. It is just to say that kids of LGBTQ parents are otherwise like any other kids and are subject to the same issues faced by kids of heterosexual parents or single parents.

Clearly when young, these kids won’t even contemplate what it means to have LGBTQ parents. It will be their normal.

Issues may arise come school-age when other kids may notice a child has two mommies or two daddies. The degree to which the child meets the question with a shrug, as if to say, so what, the greater the likelihood that the other kids will shrug it off too.

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One has to remember that the face of the family has changed considerably. Interestingly enough, many kids today do have two mommies or two daddies or a single parent. Just imagine a child being asked about having two same-sex parents turning around and saying, “So do you,” to a child with four parents.

To help LGBTQ parents better cope and manage, it can be helpful to have a support network of other similar parents.

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If your child comes home having been targeted or bullied, parents should seek to support their child and see if amends could be made on the basis of a meeting with the other child and parents, not unlike any other bullying situation (assuming not dangerous).

Different issues may arise in the event LGBTQ parents separate. There may be greater challenges in terms of parentage with surrogacy and donor DNA. If this becomes an issue, do consult a family lawyer with comfort and experience in this area.