iHeart Radio: Valentine's Day Special - Featuring Alyssa Bach, Shulman & Partners

As Valentine’s Day approaches, many couples are planning dinners, flowers, and time together. For others, this mid-winter stretch is a turning point. In a recent appearance on iHeart Radio, Shulman & Partners LLP Associate Lawyer Alyssa Bach, spoke about why the weeks leading up to February 14 often fall into what practitioners quietly call “divorce season.” From January to March, there is a noticeable rise in people seeking family law consultations, often after a stressful holiday period, financial strain, or long-standing relationship issues that come to a head. Alyssa walked listeners through what to consider if you are thinking about separation, when to speak with a lawyer, and how to protect both your emotional and financial wellbeing during a very difficult time.

"I would say the earlier you engage a lawyer, the better, and I'm not saying engage as in you need to commit to the separation in that moment, but the lawyer is there at a consultation stage, especially to help you understand what that separation is going to mean.

— Alyssa Bach, Associate Lawyer at Shulman & Partners LLP

During the interview, Alyssa explained why the early months of the year tend to bring a noticeable increase in separation inquiries. Coming out of a busy holiday season, many couples are dealing with financial stress, family obligations, and built-up tension that may have been simmering quietly for months. Shorter days, holiday spending, and extended time with relatives can all bring existing problems into sharper focus. By the time February arrives, some people feel ready to confront what they have been putting off: whether their relationship is still sustainable.

Alyssa emphasized that deciding a relationship is over is deeply personal and rarely simple. For some, there is still room to work on things, especially if both partners are willing to commit time and effort. For others, the question is not just “Is this over?” but “What would separation actually look like for me, practically and emotionally?” That is where an early legal consultation can be helpful, not as a commitment to divorce, but as a way to understand what lies ahead if that path is chosen.

She described a first meeting with a family lawyer as a space to talk through the specifics of a person’s life, rather than a generic checklist. Common topics include children and parenting: how decision-making works, what a parenting plan could look like, and how living arrangements might change. Finances are another major concern, from support obligations to what happens to property, savings, and debts. Alyssa noted that many people assume separation is straightforward, only to discover there are more moving parts than they realized, especially when one spouse has been out of the workforce, or when property is in one person’s name but both have contributed.

Choosing the right lawyer is another key theme she addressed. Alyssa suggested looking for someone who focuses on family law rather than a general practitioner, given how often legislation and case law evolve in this area. The goal is to work with someone who understands the nuances of parenting issues, support, and property division, and who can apply that knowledge to the realities of each family’s situation.

Beyond legal advice, Alyssa encouraged people to consider other supports. Counselors or therapists can help with the emotional toll of separation, offering tools to manage conflict, grief, and anxiety. Financial advisors can help people understand what life after separation might look like on a practical level, especially when moving from a shared household to a single income or when support payments will be in play.

For parents in high-conflict situations, she stressed the importance of keeping children at the center of decision-making rather than using them as extensions of adult disputes. Parenting coordinators and structured communication tools can sometimes help co-parents develop healthier ways of interacting, even if the relationship between them is strained. When there are no children involved, placing less energy into “winning” and more into accepting legal realities can make it easier to move forward without prolonging conflict unnecessarily.

Interestingly, Alyssa also noted that not every separation consultation ends in a breakup. Sometimes, going through the process of understanding what separation would involve leads couples to reevaluate and decide to work on their relationship instead. Seeing the potential consequences can push both partners to address long-avoided issues and invest in change. In that sense, information and clarity can either support a thoughtful separation or help couples recommit with eyes open.