Sooner than you know it, it’s here. Mother’s Day.
But what is supposed to be a special day to celebrate mom can be hard in a separated household.
This may be your first as a separated parent. It may be a number of years down the road. No matter how long it has been, Mother’s Day doesn’t always feel the same as it used to.
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Co-Parenting and Mother’s Day
The greeting card companies have done a marvelous job of ramping up these special days. With that, it is difficult not to have some expectation of recognition. But Mother’s Day for a separated mom can be more complicated than Hallmark intended.
Mother’s Day can be particularly hard with young kids. Can they do something on their own to honour the day? Or will they need support from their other parent? While your co-parent may help your kids plan something special, this isn’t always the case. But that doesn’t mean you should let the day pass you by. After all, every mother deserves some kind of celebration for their hard work.
Alternate Ways to Celebrate
Mother’s Day in a separated home can lead to problems. But rather than placing your child in the middle of a parental dispute, consider alternative ways to celebrate the day that won’t rely on your co-parent.
- Seek a kin or friend to help your child do something on your behalf.
- Take things into your own hands. Plan something that is more celebratory of the relationship between you and your child for your own special moment.
- Play the day low key.
- More ideas from the Single Mother Survival Guide
There is no denying you deserve a huge celebration for everything you do. Mothers are basically superheroes. But even on Mother’s Day, you can’t help but put your child first (maternal instinct, and all). These alternative celebrations can prevent your kid from ending up in the middle of a distressing situation between you and your co-parent, even if that means playing the day low key to avoid making a potentially difficult situation worse.
But regardless of how you choose to celebrate the day, avoid seeking retribution come Father’s Day. From the child’s perspective, it is difficult enough when one parent acts poorly towards the other. It can be more emotionally difficult if both are similarly engaged.
At the end of the day, the wellness of your kids is the best gift you can have. Take a look at your child and recognize all the wonderful things you have done to raise them into the person they are today. You may not get the huge celebration you undoubtedly deserve, but know that no matter what, you are doing amazing.
So from us to you, Happy Mother’s Day!